Joe Willie On The Shrimpbox: "2011 Academy Creek Awards"

THE 2011 ACADEMY CREEK AWARDS…THE AWARDS FOR LOCALLY THEMED MOTION PICTURES…THE AWARD IS NAMED AFTER THE ACADEMY CREEK WASTEWATER TREATMENT PLANT…YOU KNOW THE STINK FACTORY ON 341… BETWEEN THE CEMETARY AND THE JAIL.

FROM THE PRODUCERS OF THE “X-MEN”…COMES THE STORY OF THREE SUPERHEROS WHO SEE THEIR YEARS OF TOILING FOR THE CITIZENS COME TO A CLOSE BY BEING MAINLY REMEMBERED FOR ONE SIMPLE $3.9 MISTAKE THAT ENDED UP BEING AN EXPENSIVE DOWNTOWN DIRT PARKING LOT …”THE X-COMMISSIONERS: THE JAIL YEARS”.

FROM THE COMPANY THAT BROUGHT YOU JONAH HEX…COMES THE STORY OF A ROADWAY PROJECT THAT STARTED OUT AS A GOOD IDEA TO MOST PEOPLE UNTIL THEY FIGURED OUT SOME THINGS IMPACTING THEM IN AN UNFORESEEN NEGATIVE WAY…LIKE NOT BEING ABLE TO TURN LEFT OUT OF THE GOLDEN ISLES MARINA…OR MAKING IT MORE DIFFICULT FOR RESCUE PERSONEL TO BE ABLE TURN AROUND…IT’S THE ACTION PACKED MEDIAN THRILLER “CAUSEWAY HEX”.

THE FOLKS THAT BROUGHT YOU TWO OF THE YEAR’S MOST CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED MOVIES, “THE KING’S SPEECH” AND “BLACK SWAN”…HAVE GOTTEN TOGETHER TO BRING YOU THE STORY OF AN INCOMING CHAMBER OF COMMERCE CHAIRMAN’S SWEEPING EPIC SPEECH AT THAT PAINTED A GREAT DESCRIPTION OF OUR COMMUNITY…AND EVEN ALLOWED FOR PEOPLE TO SLEEP THROUGH IT BY ASKING EVERYONE TO “CLOSE THEIR EYES”…YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS “THE SWAN’S SPEECH”.

THE OLD 60’S TV SERIES “LOST IN SPACE” LIVES ON IN THE NEW FILM ABOUT A GROUP OF ELECTED OFFICIALS THAT CAN’T QUITE SEEM TO FUNCTION OR FIND THEiR WAY OUT OF ANY MESS WITHOUT HITTING THE TAXPAYERS FOR ANOTHER SPECIAL PURPOSE LOCAL OPTION SALES TAX…YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS THE STRANGER THAN FICTION EPIC ADVENTURE “SPLOST IN PLACE”.

Joe Willie On The Shrimpbox: "Biting the bullet on expenses"

Biting the bullet on expenses

It's tough but we all need to do our part. The President ordered the cabinet
to cut a whopping $100 million from the $3.5 trillion federal budget!

I'm so impressed by this sacrifice that I have decided to do the same thing
with my personal budget. I spend about $2000 a month on groceries, medicine,
bills, etc., but it's time to get out the budget cutting ax, go line by line
through my expenses, and go to work.

I'm going to cut my spending at exactly the same ratio -1/35,000 of my total
budget. After doing the math, it looks like instead of spending $2000 a
month; I'm going to have to cut that number by six cents!

Yes, I'm going to have to get by with $1999.94, but that's what sacrifice is
all about.

I'll just have to do without some
things, that are, frankly, luxuries.

Joe Willie On The Shrimpbox: How To Treat People

5 Lessons about the way we treat people

1 - First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:
"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50's, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

"Absolutely, " said the professor.. "In your careers, You will meet many people. All are significant...they deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello.."

I've never forgotten that lesson.. I also learned her name was Dorothy.


2. - Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rain storm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960's. The man
took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.

She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached.

It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's' bedside just before he passed away... God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."
Sincerely,
Mrs. Nat King Cole.


3 - Third Important Lesson - Always remember those

Who serve.

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.

"How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.

"Fifty cents," replied the waitress.

The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.
"Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.

By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient..."Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.

The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left.. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies..

You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.


4 - Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock.

Some of the King's' wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by nd simply walked around it.. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded.

After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the
person who removed the boulder from the roadway.

The peasant learned what many of us never understand! Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.


5 - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts...

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister.

I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her."

As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face
grew pale and his smile faded.

He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away".

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

Joe Willie On The Shrimpbox: "Cherokee Legend"

You can easily judge the character of others by how
they treat those who they think can do nothing for them.


Cherokee Legend

Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian youths' rite of Passage?

His father takes him into the forest, blindfolds him an leaves him alone.

He is required to sit on a stump the whole night and not remove the blindfold

until the rays of the morning sun shine through it.

He cannot cry out for help to anyone.
l
Once he survives the night, he is a MAN.

He cannot tell the other boys of this experience, because each lad must come into manhood on his own.

The boy is naturally terrified. He can hear all kinds of noises. Wild beasts must surely be all around him .

Maybe even some human might do him harm.


The wind blew the grass and earth, and shook his stump, but he sat stoically, never removing the blindfold.

It would be the only way he could become a man!

Finally, after a horrific night the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold.

It was then that he discovered his father sitting on the stump next to him.

He had been at watch the entire night, protecting his son from harm.

We, too, are never alone. Even when we don't know it, God is watching over us, sitting on the stump beside us.

When trouble comes, all we have to do is reach out to Him.

If you liked this story, pass it on.
If not, you took off your blindfold before dawn.

Moral of the story:
Just because you can't see God,
Doesn't mean He is not there.

Joe Willie On The Shrimpbox: "Another Great Sheriff"

Another GREAT Sheriff



POLK COUNTY FLORIDA SHERIFF GRADY JUDD

An illegal alien in Polk County Florida who got pulled over in a
routine traffic stop ended up 'executing' the deputy who stopped him.
The deputy was shot eight times, including once behind his right ear at
close range. Another deputy was wounded and a police dog killed.

A state-wide manhunt ensued.

The murderer was found hiding in a wooded area and as soon as he
took a shot at the SWAT team, officers opened fire on him. They hit the
guy 68 times.

Naturally, the liberal media went nuts and asked why they had to
shoot the poor undocumented immigrant 68 times.


Sheriff Grady Judd told the Orlando Sentinel: 'Because that's
all the ammunition we had..' Now, is that just about the all-time
greatest answer or what!

The Coroner also reported that the illegal alien died of natural
causes...
When asked by a reporter how that could be since there were 68
bullet wounds in his body,
he simply replied: (BEST QUOTE of 2009) ...
"when you are shot 68 times you are naturally gonna die."


GOD BLESS AMERICA !

Joe Willie On The Shrimpbox: "LAW of the Garbage Truck"

LAW of the Garbage Truck

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport.
We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us.
My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us.
My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was really friendly.
So I asked, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!'
This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.'

He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment.As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets,
so ... Love the people who treat you right.
Pray for the ones who don't.
Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it!